In the same manner as all inescapable worldly pleasures and pains, Valentine’s Day has come again, and with it comes an incessant string of articles littering your feeds with guides to love, date ideas, and advertisements for last minute gifts. However, for you, today I offer a chance for simple reflection and a look towards the single most important person in any of our lives: you. Cupid- son of Venus, who today arouses feelings of love and a gentle reminder of the bountiful spring to come. Though in all his glorious deeds, his arrow’s strike may still seem lacking for some. For all the teachings of the Gods, old and new, one seems missing today as the digital era unapologetically drives forward the greater disconnect between Self and Reality.
Know thyself, Be thyself, and arguably the most important on this distinguished day of love, Love thyself. Nosce te ipsum, Esto te ipsum, Dilige te ipsum. While this may seem obvious to some, a trend exists today; for many, self-love comes with the most unfortunate of strings attached. So today, I urge you to ask yourself if this statement applies to you:
When others love me, then I will love myself.
If you answered no, I commend you and encourage you to move weightlessly through the world with an increased awareness of the grand opportunity for love before you, and urge you to touch other’s lives in meaningful ways, throwing caution and regard for the opinions of your peers out the window.
More than likely though, if you’ve read this far, you answered yes- to some varying degree. The extent to which we all rely on others for a sense of self-worth ranges widely on the spectrum; from those of who require minute to minute reminders that they are loved and haven’t been left alone to face the great absurdities of life, to those so discontent with their selves that any interaction with others merely becomes another affirmation of their own shortcomings.
When did you let your anxieties take hold and push you to forget the simple truth- you can love yourself as well as others, that you can be selfish, that love is a currency worth more than any fiat money, that at the end of the day when you are alone with your thoughts you can choose what you worship, you choose whether to focus on the good or the bad, and that if you don’t love yourself you can never truly love anyone else.
So, regardless of who’s loving you and you loving who, take some time today to flick your proverbial bean however you see fit. For if today of all days, cupid’s arrow strikes you, let it remind you to love yourself equally as much as your partner. Let it remind you that one of the few things you can control in this fucked-up world is the depth of your love for others, and, more importantly, how much you love yourself.
For further reading today: Benjamin Franklin – On Selecting a Mistress – 1745 Giovanni Boccaccio – On Putting the Devil into Hell