Students in Awe of Choices Available at the BLUU

The Brown Lupton University Union, or the BLUU as the students call it, is home to the cafeteria used by almost every student everyday. They can find a wonderfully varied selection of meal options here, such as grilled chicken, fried chicken, chicken noodle soup, chicken tortilla soup, chicken stir fry, chicken pasta, chicken wings, chicken nuggets, and chicken and waffles on a good day. “There is just so much to choose from. I can always eat something different every day and never get bored,” said Anna English, a Sophomore at TCU. “I can eat fried chicken one day and next day have some grilled chicken. Sometimes I even eat grilled chicken two days in a row if I’m feeling adventurous.”

We asked another student, an anonymous senior, to give us their take on the meal plan at the BUU after having been told that the food may have adverse effects on students.

“I have been eating at the BLUU since my freshman year, and the food just keeps getting better and better. The food hasn’t really done much to me other than occasionally upset my stomach. Well, that’s not true, there are a few things. Since the middle of my sophomore year, I wake up every couple of weeks at the crack of dawn and feel the urge to wake everyone in my building. Then there was the time all of my teachers came together to find out why the writing on my tests and papers looked like chicken scratches. Oh, and I do find a random white feather in the shower now and again. I don’t think anything strange has happened to me though.”

We managed to stop a clearly upset student on their way out of the BLUU and questioned them about their mood and if they had eaten at the BLUU. “I chose not to, nothing really looked too good. It rarely happens, but there a few days where no matter what amazingly diverse options they have, nothing really looks too appetizing. Not much you can do about that.” It seemed that their experience with the BLUU was the reason for their state of being. When we asked them what their plans were from there, they answered that they were going to Chik-Fil-A instead.

Another student, who we are only able to identify as FrogCluck42, sent us an email telling us of their experience with the BLUU. “The food at the BLUU is delicious and nutritious; there is really nothing else to say about it. Please stop looking into this matter. It is of great importance that you no longer ask students about this issue. If you wish to keep your sanity, stay away from the kitchen in the back. Only staff ever make it out. People who try to find out the truth tend to get ‘plucked’ one by one. Watch your backs and may Super Frog have mercy on you.” We received another email from a ChancellorLinguini1873 asking to meet with us alone at Moudy at 1:00 A.M. next to the creepy student sculptures so as not to attract any suspicion. We plan on meeting ChancellorLinguini1873 at the designated area since we were not able to get them to respond to any of our other emails asking them how they felt about the meals available to the students. We will keep you posted on any further developments.

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